I'm going to post all these together and let Jan have a chance to jump in. This is the last of the email conversation I've been writing about in my last 2 posts. There were points where Jan and I agreed, and I could feel myself beginning to feel something familiar coming from the opposite side of the chasm, but I was still really pushy with my points. (Me ... pushy! ... go figure.)

If you want... more

Back to the Jan and Sandra, Birth Mom vs. Adoptive Mom, wrestling match:

Assumptions were being made on both our parts. Here's me reacting to one from her:

That is not in any way a blanket distain for birth mothers. It is also not a reaction to feeling threatened, but of being insulted.

Adoptive moms ...that's the name we're allowed. We're neither real nor natural, and no matter how often I read "the... more

If you're reading both my take on the bridge building between birth mom, Jan, and adoptive mom, me, and Jan's, you've learned that the two of us have a heck of a lot in common; we're of the same era, neither is the shy, retiring type, and we were both teen brides with buns in the oven as we hopefully took our vows with fingers crossed ... dodging a bullet, as Jan says. To carry the commonality even a step further, we both now blog for Adoption.Com.

Funny... more

This is the second in a series about the process Jan Baker and I went through trying to understand each other's perspective on adoption. See Jan's blog for the view from her side. So, Jan made a touching comment on my blog, and how did I respond? By biting her head off, of course.

By the time this came around, I'd lost my pussy-foot shoes and figured if I was ever to get to any nitty-gritty... more

Adoption Search and Birth/First Parent blogger, Jan Baker, and I have spent the past few months annoying the bejeezus out of each other. We come to adoption from different directions ... she's a birth mom / I'm an adoptive mom ... and we're both just a bit opinionated and a lot passionate about most things in life, so arrived at the blogging table here at Adoptionblogs.Com with hefty agendas.

Early on, we both... more