Comments on: Attachment Issues: Help is Available http://international.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/attachment-issues-help-is-available Adoption information on intercountry adoption process, \"How to\", worldwide adoption news, adoption advocacy and reform, adoption travel and birth country visits, adoption stories, parenting international kids. Thu, 11 Mar 2010 18:12:24 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Unequivocal Kate http://international.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/attachment-issues-help-is-available/comment-page-1#comment-1411 Unequivocal Kate Thu, 15 Oct 2009 23:15:25 +0000 http://international.adoptionblogs.com/?p=965#comment-1411 I have four adopted special needs children. Three of them have reactive attachment disorder. Unfortunately, my experience with social workers in the State of Oregon is not good and I understand the reluctance of parents to share their fears, concerns and struggles about their children. Once an adoption has finalized, the system seems more designed to accuse parents than to help them. Numerous times we have had Oregon Department of Human Services (DHS) caseworkers imply that our children had issues because of our parenting and not because of reactive attachment disorder (RAD), fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS), etc. We also found that the caseworkers had very little knowledge about the issues facing our children and family as they were primarily trained to deal with child protective services issues. It has taken us YEARS to get the help that our kids needed, working with the State. Finding the Oregon Post Adoption Resource Center was a godsend for our family as we finally found the advocates that we needed. You're absolutely correct, it is important to know the resources that are available. I highly recommend looking outside of DHS agencies. Counselors that specialize in dealing with issues like FAS and RAD are invaluable. Other adoptive parents are also exceptional resources. It's possible that one will be labeled an "unfit" or "unsuitable" parent when asking for help. I think it's important to acknowledge the truth of that. That said there is no reason to FEAR it. An adoptive parent needs to be strong, proactive, and a good advocate for the child and family and that means seeking help and asking questions, regardless of how it's received. I have four adopted special needs children. Three of them have reactive attachment disorder. Unfortunately, my experience with social workers in the State of Oregon is not good and I understand the reluctance of parents to share their fears, concerns and struggles about their children. Once an adoption has finalized, the system seems more designed to accuse parents than to help them. Numerous times we have had Oregon Department of Human Services (DHS) caseworkers imply that our children had issues because of our parenting and not because of reactive attachment disorder (RAD), fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS), etc. We also found that the caseworkers had very little knowledge about the issues facing our children and family as they were primarily trained to deal with child protective services issues. It has taken us YEARS to get the help that our kids needed, working with the State.

Finding the Oregon Post Adoption Resource Center was a godsend for our family as we finally found the advocates that we needed. You’re absolutely correct, it is important to know the resources that are available. I highly recommend looking outside of DHS agencies. Counselors that specialize in dealing with issues like FAS and RAD are invaluable. Other adoptive parents are also exceptional resources. It’s possible that one will be labeled an “unfit” or “unsuitable” parent when asking for help. I think it’s important to acknowledge the truth of that. That said there is no reason to FEAR it. An adoptive parent needs to be strong, proactive, and a good advocate for the child and family and that means seeking help and asking questions, regardless of how it’s received.

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