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Today, I decided to bake an apple…something. Eventually, I settled on a pie, but first hit up a few of my favorite online recipe sites to see if I could find a Guatemalan recipe that calls for about five pounds of apples (I didn’t, but probably because my two favorite pastry chefs were a little impatient to get started). As a last ditch effort, I hit up some of my favorite social networking sites with a general call for Guatemalan apple recipes (I’m interlinked with quite a few fabulous GuateMamas–it can’t hurt to ask!), and was met with the following comment from a friend/non-adoptive parent:
“How about just something boring and American? Like a pie or something. Do you ever make American food at that house? 
”
Well, as fate would have it, I did whip up an apple pie. A plain, old, delicious-smelling apple pie. And while the comment wasn’t meant in harm or offense, it did get me thinking. As an adoptive mother of a Guatemalan daughter, I try my best to implement Guatemalan culture into our life on the regular. But this brings up the age-old struggle which many international adoptive parents face: do I try too hard? Am I not trying hard enough?
I want Beauty (and Bear, for that matter) to grow up thinking that American and Guatemalan culture go seamlessly hand in hand. I don’t want it to seem forced or awkward; I don’t want Guatemalan culture to get too overshadowed by the immediacy and availability of American culture. I try to lean heavier into the cooking/baking aspects (since I love to partake in both activities and so do the kids–an instant catalyst for conversation with a tasty outcome). In addition, it also provides variety in our diet (if you’ll recall, Beauty is the epitome of an “eat anything” kid; Bear, on the other hand, prefers his tried and true handful of dietary options). We also, as a family, try to implement Guatemalan culture in all holidays, adding in our own celebrations for Guatemala’s Independence Day, Children’s Day, and so on.We have a map of both countries in detail. We own many books for all age ranges regarding both countries. In short, we try to make it seem a natural part of every day life.
I don’t believe the “we’re in America!” excuse should hold any water whatsoever when implementing your child’s birth country culture into your everyday lives. It’s vital to raise your adopted child with a sense of identity and pride in his/her homeland. It’s so much easier to start incorporating a blend of both in your basic, day-to-day life as early as possible, rather than try to lump it all into erratic conversations as your child grows and begins to ask questions. I don’t want Beauty to ask me “what is Guatemala like?” when she’s in third grade; my hope is that she’ll be able to tell her third grade class quite a bit about her birth country, even after having not set foot on Guatemalan soil since she left at nine months of age (we are planning to return to Guatemala when the kids are all older, but it probably won’t happen by the time she hits third grade). Most importantly, I feel a steadfast knowledge of Guatemala will help Beauty respect her past, her present and her future–all seamlessly sewn into her life and sense of self.
