Back in high school, I had a good friend whose mother when miffed would, for the fifty-millionth time, say, "You know that you're just a placenta, don't you? When you were born, the doctor threw away the baby and wrapped the afterbirth up for me to take home."

My father would tell anyone who asked my full name, actually Sandra Noreen, that it was Sandra No Weenie, "Because she doesn't have one."

I wrapped my son's fifth birthday presents and set them all out in plain view a day in advance with the express intent of torturing him with anticipation.

A quick Internet search just provided such cruelties doled out by parents onto the innocent heads of their adorable children as:

If you fall out of the tree and break your legs, don't come running to me.

Stop crying, or I'll give you something to cry about.

Which one of you wants smacking first?

Christmas is CANCELLED.

You were born in a barn!

Add to those contributions like, "You sound just like your father when you make that disgusting noise!", "You'll never have trouble swimming with THOSE feet!", and "I brought you into this world, I can take you out!", and you get a fairly representative list of common family refrains.

I have no doubt readers are well able to supply their own comments that can cut to the quick, either heaped on their own heads by parents, spilled from their own lips to children, or both.

Cringe inducing? You bet. Divisive? In the adoption community where almost anything can blow a triad to at least three peices, probably.

After yesterday's News blog where I was going all soft and squishy-like over embracing the common ground that lies within the adoption triad over open birth records, today it seems that ground is shaking like an 8.1 with potential for a big vertical shift.

A New York Times blog post by author and adoptive mother Tama Janowitz has gone off like a cluster bomb and has many running for some big guns. Gauntlets have been thrown and beads are being drawn.

There is some commonality still, as some birth parents are as up in arms as adult adoptees over Ms. Janowitz's unapologetic poke at transracial international adoption that uses her own daughter as the butt, but also no shortage of people amused as anything and thankful for a tension-releasing giggle, even one not at all PC and at the expense of someone's kid because ... what the heck! ... we've all been there.

Here's the bit that's causing most of the hoopla:

So in a way it is kind of nice to know as a parent of a child, biological or otherwise – whatever you do is going to be wrong. Like I say to Willow: “Well, you know, if you were still in China you would be working in a factory for 14 hours a day with only limited bathroom breaks!”

And she says — as has been said by children since time immemorial — “So what, I don’t care. I would rather do that than be here anyway.”

Them's apparently fightin' words ... or at least words that need a whole lot more words chucked in their general direction. Serious, strong words that don't pussyfoot around or leave any questions as to their indignation.

Words like these from Lisa Marie:

Did she really in such a joking manner make a mockery of those folks who are working under the conditions of economic slavery imposed by the U.S. that actually admits that the black, brown and yellow folks they utilize as a labor force don’t deserve basic human rights? And does she forget that ‘those folks’ are her daughters people?

Or this bloggers reaction:

I’m just frothing at the mouth, writhing around, clawing at my eyes and wishing I could punch this woman, many times, right in the face.

Jae Ran of Harlow's Monkey fame updated often until comments were closed, tabulating the number of opinions that weren't posted, strongly suggesting censorship on the part of the Times. Since there are issues ostensibly of monstrous magnitude involved, the thought that some opinions have not been published while others have been is creating an atmosphere of oppression that has bloggers, at least, chomping on the bit they feel is stifling their reactions, and has one asking: "This begs the question: just what does The New York Times have against adult adoptees?"

So, Ms. Janowitz ... hip, urban mom with a wicked wit, horrid racist, adoptive mother from hell? Or something else completely?

The reaction ... OTT, right on the money, sheesh? Or something else?

Thoughts?