Our Decision To Adopt Internationally

Why did we adopt internationally?

I still don’t have a quick answer for this question that is asked so often. Hubby and I didn’t just decided one day to adopt from Ethiopia. It was more like a gradual pulling that started when we were teenagers dating and guided us to Ethiopia after 13 years of marriage and two bio kids later.

The longing to adopt for me started as a child. I would watch “Little House on the Prairie” and see how Pa and Ma always had room for more children who needed a home. It really was my first look at how families are made in different ways, and that difference could be a wonderful thing.

Hubby and I looked into adopting right out of college when we lived and worked in South America. The cost stopped us then. We had our first child, Meg and were so busy that we didn’t get around to thinking about another child for four years. When we were ready I called the local children’s services and was told that we had to foster before we could adopt (now I know this is not true). I checked into some domestic adoptions and the cost again, seemed overwhelming. We got pregnant with Elle and again adoption was put on the backburner.

While I was pregnant with Elle I read in a Good Housekeeping magazine an article written by Melissa Faye Greene and discussed the hardships that Ethiopia was having due to the AIDS epidemic. That article stuck with me and when we decided that we wanted more children I searched the internet and found that article.

I feel in love with Ethiopia, our agency’s work there (humanitarian work as well as adoption services) and the rest is history. I don’t see international adoption as a “better” avenue of adoption. It is just how we were pulled.

Our story is boring and basic, but true! I sometimes cringe when I hear people say that International adoption is easier, cheaper or means a closed adoption. The adoption process is never easy, money should never be a determining factor when bringing a new child into the home, and we have had the privilege of meeting our children’s family. We send letters and pictures and hope that one day we will see each other again.

Photo Credit: Mandyw 2008

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