With Michelle over on the Foster Adopt blog, and a load of folks on the forums talking about the right time to add siblings to the family mix, if at all, this report caught my eye this morning.

It's a hot topic on the playground, how much time is the right amount between siblings?

If you have a choice in the matter, is it better to have kids one after the other or wait a few years?

This isn't a decision couples had to make a few years back. Before family planning became a reliable reality, one child every year was expected ... no matter what the circumstances. (Mark's father is one of twelve!)

Even now, things can happen ...

My friend, Amy, has four kids. The oldest just turned six and the youngest is ten months, with the longest gap between any of them about 20 months. I know for a fact that she did not plan this birth sequence, but she certainly does manage it. Her visits to my place may be more like invasions from a warring country, and her house a tough place to have the book club meet, but she loves her brood, all four boisterous, obstreperous, opinionated, fractious six-and-under, all-boys-but-the-baby of them, and wouldn't trade a one of them in for an all-expense paid vacation on the Italian Riviera. (Okay, maybe she'd rent a couple of them out for a week or so!)

Sarah Smith with Parenting Magazine ... "There is no such thing as perfect sibling spacing. For every mom that thinks that a year apart is perfect for her, there is another mom who thinks that 10 years apart is much better."

That said, Smith explains there are some distinct advantages and disadvantages to consider.

For example, siblings who are close in age may have more in common. They can be playmates and have similar interests, making it easier to do things together as a family.

Another upside, the time parents spend caring for babies and toddlers is condensed, so getting back on a career path may be easier.

On the other hand, think about it, are you really ready for another year of diapers right away?

I'm not all that bothered about diapers ... it's the fighting that can go on between kids close in age that drives me crazy.

My little ones, at two and a half years apart in age, adore each other ... BUT with Cj now old enough to trample Sam's migrations like Godzilla tumbled Tokyo, small skirmishes are beginning to break out occasionally.

As adoptive families, we have an advantage over those making kids the old fashioned way ... we can not only dictate when we have our kids, but how old they are when we get them.

Not fond of poop?

Older children are wonderful additions.

Don't want to go out of birth order?

Fine. Babies and toddlers are a lot of fun.

Want a bunch of 'em all at once?

Adopt a sibling group with sib spacing built in.

As with all issues involving children, there are no guarantees when adopting, aside from one: it's pretty much impossible to adopt accidentally.

I doubt there's ever been a case of a couple having a few too many glasses of wine on a romantic evening, tossing caution to the wind ... and compiling a dossier.