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I was recently cleaning out some old and much needed to be thinned-out adoption files. I found myself having to decide what to keep and what to through out (recycle, shred, etc.). Old articles that I once cherished and read over and over again now seemed irrelevant, medical information on traveling to Ethiopia would never be used again, as I’m sure this information will change before our next trip to Ethiopia. I also had information on phases that we have passed and I feel I don’t need to read about again.
So what do I think you should keep handy two years after your adoption has been finalized? Here are my rambling thoughts on the information I just went through two years after our adoption of Mita and Enu from Ethiopia.
Keep Forever
* Finalized adoption papers, birth certificates, certificates of citizenship and your home-study should be kept forever.
* Your referral pictures and child information, including health and case study reports as well as anything else you may have been given of your child’s past. Remember that this is information that your child may not be ready to to see just yet, but it may be your only bit of history to give to your child in regards to his/her adoption and birth family.
*For International adoptions, be sure to keep all of your immigration finalized paper work and your child’s passport from his/her country. The passport may not be usable anymore, but what a great thing to keep for your child.
* Save copies of attempts you have made for more information about the child’s history. I know that I may never get answers to some of the questions I have asked of my children’s Ethiopian father, but I do have a copy of the letter I sent him asking him these questions. My girls will know that I tried to find these things out for them and in years to come that may mean something to them.
Throw Out
*Articles, magazines, books that are out-of-date and in general not helpful anymore. You can pass these on to other waiting parents if you think they will be helpful, but your file cabinet will overflow with all the fluff you have collecting during the adoption process.
*Information on children that you did not pursue to adopt. After we had accepted our referrals of Mita and Enu I felt I needed to shred the information we had gotten on other children. I also destroyed the waiting children DVDs. I look at it this way: Would I want strangers (even if they are nice strangers!) having health information and pictures of Mita and Enu? Of course not!
Not Sure What to Do With
* Have a file with some of the hard to get rid of papers and look in it again in a few months, in time a lot of it won’t be relevant anymore and you can purge some more!
*Be sure to go over these items with your spouse or partner, even your child if they are old enough and mature enough to be discerning.
I plan to expand on my girls’ life-books someday to include the referral information, adoption papers and correspondence with their Ethiopian father. Right now I don’t feel it would be therapeutic for them to have it under their pillows, but someday they can have it to do with what they wish.
Any ideas on keeping papers or getting rid of them? Where do you keep your adoption paperwork?
